I have often wondered about changes in the Fall (that's Autumn for some of you.) The leaves change, although, in the South, we don't see much of that. The wind shifts from the south to the north. Nights are cooler. DAYS are cooler. Band and Football. Well, you get the drift.
This applies to me as well. I get a feeling that I should be doing something. Could it be a leftover ingrained memory from my Mom - "we gotta get out the winter clothes and pack up Summer." Usually that meant handing down those clothes that didn't fit anymore and getting handdowns that didn't fit anymore....
But this year, it means making some decisions. To move or not to move (away from the beach). To stay at this hospital or to move to another hospital (that is really not in my hands -- it is in the hiring committee's). Another year of struggling to pay all of the bills (that one I am really sick of.... by the way.)
To hover or not to hover.... My kids tell me that I am a helicopter mom.... (I couldn't disagree more, but perception is everything.) On second thought, is it a helicopter mom to care, to follow and to inquire? I say.... maybe.
Anyway, the senses and feelings of Fall continue to plague me. Today on the beach, the winds were cooler and the waves were higher with white caps. It was lovely. The windows open to allow in that wonderful breeze... it seems like paradise again. Not one mosquito bite from the walk..... ah, heaven.
As I read back over this note, I realize I am rambling, so I will bring it to a close. Unfortunately, that rambling is stuck in my brain.... Like the lyrics to a song that just won't go away. One of these days soon, it will stop, but likely after I stop mulling over things I can't change and accept that what will be, will be....
Que sera, sera.
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